“Combining Work and Motherhood” was the theme of the very first self-support group for Ukrainian women in media, organized by the NGO “Women in Media”. This meeting took place on January 16, 2020, in Kyiv at the Dialog Hub space and marked the beginning of such groups in the years to come. Since then, Women in Media has held more than 30 self-support groups in both offline and online formats.
How it all began
“Lisa Kuzmenko, the head of Women in Media, wrote to me and mentioned that they wanted to start a project with self-support groups. We discussed what this might involve and the difference between a therapy group and a self-help group. The most important thing was that we wouldn’t delve into deep psychological issues or try to change anything, relatively speaking, in a person’s life scenario. It was meant to be an open group, without strict regulations,” says psychotherapist Maria Fabricheva about the establishment of the first groups. Throughout these years, meetings for women in media have taken place under her guidance.
According to the terms, self-support groups are designed exclusively for women working in Ukrainian media — journalists, editors, presenters, media lawyers, illustrators, media managers, and others — who are members of the Women in Media community on Facebook. Announcements of upcoming meetings, along with accompanying materials such as exercises and tests, are posted in this closed community. Confidentiality is ensured during the groups: no recordings, photos, or videos are made, and what is discussed in the groups remains private. Participants can join as they wish; attendance at every meeting is not required. The key is that the proposed topic resonates.
One of the participants in the first group was Sofia Kochmar, an international media producer. At that time, she was on maternity leave with a one-year-old child, making the topic of combining work and motherhood especially relevant for her.
“It was a very important experience for me, because it may be why I stayed in the profession. When you are on maternity leave, it often seems like the life you once dreamed of may no longer exist. In journalism, we are often judged by our texts, awards, performances, and scandals. But when you are simply existing, no one seems interested. No one is friends with Sofia when she is just a mother; they are friends with Sofia the journalist,” Sofia Kochmar reflects on her impressions of the first meeting. She adds that the meeting helped her a lot to “get out of the one-room apartment and back into the real world.”
Sofia also highlights the significance of participating in the groups after the start of the full-scale war. She says it helped her a lot to see “different examples of herself” among other women in media.
“I realized that we essentially have the same problems as other women in the profession. We face the same fears and challenges, though we have different ways of dealing with them,” says Sofia Kochmar. “After that, I switched to individual therapy. However, a self-support group is equally valuable. It teaches you to see yourself from an outside perspective, which is difficult to achieve in one-on-one conversations.”
Looking back to January 2019, Maria Fabricheva recalls that when she started working with self-support groups, no one could have anticipated the challenges that lay ahead. The first challenge was the COVID-19 pandemic, which disrupted the usual rhythm of life. Due to the pandemic, the groups were forced to move online for the first time. The psychotherapist admits that she was initially hesitant about the idea, as she prefers working offline. However, the concept of online meetings took hold, allowing media women from other cities, not just Kyiv, to participate as well.
“I’m a bit conservative in this regard, so I was uncomfortable at first. I said that online is more of a lecture format, and I couldn’t give any exercises because, for example, I couldn’t see a person’s reactions or body language. But then you adapt, and step by step, you realize that you can try different approaches. During this time, we also created a Google Drive folder with useful exercises, videos, and techniques that group members can use in their future work,” says Maria Fabricheva.
During COVID-19, self-support groups focused on the challenges related to lockdown and quarantine restrictions, such as how to coexist with relatives, parents, partners, children, and oneself in a 24/7 environment, how to structure time after transitioning to remote work, and how to avoid burnout amid these new challenges.
War as a new challenge
With the onset of the full-scale war in February 2022, the online meeting format became relevant again. Many women in media were forced to temporarily relocate — some went abroad, while others moved to different cities within Ukraine. Yet, everyone felt a strong need for mutual support, help, and the opportunity to speak openly among “their people.” Maria Fabricheva refers to the meetings after the invasion began as “the foundation for psycho-emotional survival”:
“It was a dialogue about how to take care of yourself, provide self-support, and offer mutual support to those around you. We discussed what trauma is and how the brain works, practiced breathing techniques like breathing in a circle or square, and did eye exercises. This is a preventive foundation — a set of cheat sheets on how to help yourself and adapt to these times.”
Some participants later found these “cheat sheets” essential in practice. For example, radio presenter Viktoriia Polchenko from Kyiv, who joined the self-support groups at the second meeting, recalls hiding from enemy attacks in a basement on the outskirts of the capital during the first days of the full-scale war. There, she had to remember the exercises Maria Fabricheva taught in the groups to calm a neighbor who was experiencing a panic attack.
“A mixture of fear and uncertainty filled the air, and there were neighbors I hadn’t known until then, including a woman with teenage girls. We all tried to communicate and move around in the cramped basement, sharing information. But this woman just sat with the girls, barely moving. Her shoulders would occasionally rise, then freeze, then fall — up and down, up and down. At first, I thought she was crying. It was the first panic attack I had ever seen. Then I remembered Maria Fabricheva’s advice: to stabilize your condition, try naming five things you see around you, four sounds you hear, and three smells or tastes,” Viktoriia Polchenko recalls.
The woman Viktoriia remembers said as her first phrase: “I think I forgot how to breathe.” Viktoriia adds that she breathed alongside her. The help she once received in a self-support group ended up supporting someone else: “It was also an additional aid to me, as I was also afraid and, it seemed, had forgotten how to breathe. But I remembered and was able to share the knowledge that, before the war, was useful in dealing with deadline stress, when you need to ground yourself, push back, and keep moving forward.”
She also highlights other topics that have been personally useful to her, such as meetings on “imposter syndrome” and addressing toxic behavior from colleagues. She refers to self-support groups as “a group for knowledge support and communication within the community”:
“The group also introduced me to talented colleagues. It’s truly a space where it’s safe to share thoughts, where you feel among your people, and where giving and receiving feedback is easy and free.”
Maria Fabricheva, in turn, recalls how requests for conversation topics changed after February 24, 2022. Initially, the meetings focused on adapting to the new conditions. These conversations focused on support, helping participants express their emotions and feelings in a safe group atmosphere. As people adapted to the challenging conditions of war, accommodations were made, and the process of building new connections began. Questions related to work and family were added, but, of course, all of them were, in one way or another, connected to the topic of war.
A new start for self-discovery
For some participants, the self-support groups from Women in Media served as a catalyst for seeking individual psychotherapy. According to Maria Fabricheva, over the entire duration of these groups, more than ten women approached her with similar requests. Some of them began individual consultations with Maria herself, while others selected a professional based on her recommendations.
“I can say that a hidden purpose of these meetings is also to popularize working with a psychotherapist, promoting a healthy lifestyle, and preventive self-care,” emphasizes Maria Fabricheva. “The women reached out to me not only in search of psychotherapists but also for referrals to psychiatrists, as they needed help stabilizing their conditions, preventing exacerbations, and obtaining medical support or therapy.”
One of those who sought individual therapy after attending self-support groups is freelance journalist Olena Kushchenko, who first joined the group in the spring of 2023. She remembers emerging from the subway that evening and hearing the air raid alert. At that moment, she felt frustrated because it had taken a long time to get to the location, she had struggled to find someone to watch her child while she was out, and she feared that the alarm would force her to return home. However, the meeting took place that day.
“At that moment, I was very depressed, with many thoughts and a sense of despair. When we sat in a circle and shared our experiences, it was very supportive for me to realize that journalists and editors I look up to and respect immensely had similar experiences,” shares Olena Kushchenko.
Thanks to Maria Fabricheva, she developed an interest in transactional analysis and subsequently took the introductory course “Transactional Analysis-101” to better understand how this method works in psychotherapy.
“Her explanations, apt examples, and humor not only helped me gradually understand myself better but also made me eager to attend the meetings repeatedly. Additionally, I began searching for a psychologist for individual therapy. After one of the meetings, I asked Maria for recommendations. She responded with the contacts of several female colleagues, and that’s how I found a specialist with whom I am still working,” Olena Kushchenko shares her story.
For her, self-support meetings are about pleasant communication, analysis, and useful information, as well as getting out and meeting people:
“I work from home, almost constantly with my child, and my circle of communication is limited to other mothers from the playground. Professional communication, reflection, and a supportive circle are sorely lacking. So, I eagerly register for meetings whenever I have the chance. I am grateful to Women in the Media for the organization.”
Search for a resource in the support of “your people”
Thanks to the rules established in the groups, a space of safety and confidentiality has been created where participants know and trust each other. This format has been tested over time, reflects Maria Fabricheva. Everything that happens within the group — what is spoken, expressed, and experienced — remains within that circle. From this arises the principle of mutual respect and support.
“A person can be themselves; they can express both typical and atypical emotions, thoughts, or attitudes toward a problem or situation and still be accepted — not condemned or devalued. This creates an opportunity to find emotional relief, stabilize your condition, check reality, receive collegial support, and, among other things, understand that everything is okay with you,” says the psychotherapist.
Ruslana Kravchenko, the program host and editor at Hromadske Radio, also emphasizes the importance of such meetings “among our people.” There, you can discuss issues that are particularly close and painful for those working in the media field:
“I’m very glad that these self-support groups exist, and I’m especially glad that they are available now. Sometimes it seems to me that the burnout experienced by journalists and others is profoundly different. Sometimes, loved ones may not understand what there is to complain about while working in the seemingly glamorous world of journalism. That is why I especially value these meetings among “our people,” where we discuss and reflect on issues unique to those in this profession. I appreciate the answers to many questions, the always relevant topics, and the quality of communication. I am glad to be part of this group.”
Another participant of the groups, who visited them several times but wished to remain anonymous, also highlights the support women offer each other as a key factor. This support, she emphasizes, is one of the pillars on which “this strange world” rests:
“In the most challenging times, it’s crucial not to be alone, to have someone to turn to and speak with. So, when it comes to self-support groups, especially those created by women for women, it’s a perfect match. Even if you come without a specific request, such conversations offer the chance to hear something new and pay attention to things you hadn’t considered before. It’s also an opportunity to step away from the daily hustle of work, home, and life, and to take time for yourself,” says the media woman.
The journalist hopes that similar initiatives will be launched in all cities of Ukraine, as there are many media women who would greatly benefit from self-support groups.
The Take Care of Your Health initiative by Women in Media is implemented within the framework of the Voices of Ukraine support program. The program, led by the European Centre for Press and Media Freedom, is part of the Hannah-Arendt-Initiative and is funded by the German Federal Foreign Office.